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Raising two different kids?Parenting with Video Games Addition.

 

Raising two different kids!

 

No two people are the same. They could be similar but not the same. Even the children from the same mother can turn out poles apart. Children, siblings, cousins, sons, and daughters have individual traits. While we think their upbringing affects them, they learn a lot from their environment, parents, and surroundings. 

 

Christopher was a six-year-old charming and happy-go-lucky child...the firstborn of his parents. He was the entire world for a very young mother and a first-time father. They couldn't be any happier. From conception, they had dreamed about having a baby boy. The internet became their friend, and they surfed multiple websites to find a decent name for a baby boy. His mom wanted a baby girl, but his dad was determined to have a boy. "My son will be a player, and the girls around him will fall out here and there," his father proudly said. 

 

Christopher's father left his home country to work for an International company abroad. He was happy in the small family he created in a new land. The maids surrounded Christopher. He was pampered and spoiled. After staying for a few years, one day, Christopher's father accepted a new job and decided to move again to another country and explore further opportunities. Christopher was just two years old, too small to understand what was happening around him. He was happy to go lucky type of boy, so loving. The neighbors held him for hours and played with him. 

 

Back in the time, Christopher's parents had dreams they wanted to accomplish but couldn't for certain reasons. Once they became parents, they aspired to provide everything for their son. It started with expensive toys, cars, and other stuff that usually happens with kids. They wanted to buy the best new thing available in the market for Christopher.

 

Time passed, and his parents didn't care about the money as Christopher grew. He didn't even have to demand it, but it was there for him before he even asked for it. Christopher kept getting everything things. The latest, the modern, the expensive, and slowly, he stopped to care. Later, he wasn't happy with the small gifts....if his grandma-grandpa brought gifts, he would be unhappy measuring their quality. 

 

One fine day, Christopher's parents received a dinner voucher for a luxury hotel from a friend. It wasn't often they had visited a five-star hotel for a meal, and it was the newly opened branded hotel in the city. They were ecstatic. Now, they had to figure out how to handle their hyperactive child Christopher. He would never sit still. He was three and a half but always on his feet, running around—no wonder where his parents carried him in the stroller during their mall visits or shopping. Having a stroller during dinner in a luxury hotel didn't seem like a great idea. They wanted a solution that could keep him occupied in one place, and they wouldn't worry about him while relishing their meal and opulence.

 

They remembered an old friend whose son was always occupied by a tiny device in the back of their car seat whenever they went for a drive. That boy was always so calm and never said a word. Many times, Christopher's family drove with them, and they couldn't even notice the boy in the car. 

 

Christopher's parents' faces lit up with that great idea. To buy him something like that could keep him engaged during the entire dinner. They took some time off during the lunch break and bought something they never thought could cost them a fortune one day. It came out to be a disaster—a disaster like the wind before the storm. 

 

It started with an unbranded gaming device, very entertaining for anyone that age or older. You bet it was not Christopher but his parents who were intrigued. They were thrilled to buy and gift it to their beloved son. As kids, they never had the privilege of buying something like this. 

 

On Friday night, they dressed well for dinner and were ready for a night to be remembered. They wanted to create some memories. Christopher's parents hadn't opened the pack yet. They wanted to wait until they reached the hotel. You know how the child is thrilled to see the gift pack and plays with it until it wears off and then moves to another. 

 

A few minutes later, their car arrived at the valet. The valet assistant came to take the car. The family walked in towards the restaurant called "Blue and Orange." The food extravaganza caught their eye, happy faces, families giggling together, and couples cheering at other tables. The ambiance enchanted them. The waiter received them and politely asked them to take them to their table. They settled in, and now it was the time to introduce something they would always curse themselves for. 

 

As Christopher got comfortable in the baby chair and looked around to explore what he could do, his parents opened the pack and handed over the tiny gaming device he had never seen before. He ripped the paper to see what was inside. A tiny box like pandora's box startled his young mind. Inside the box was a device wrapped in decorative packaging. It looked like a big-size remote control with a small TV in the middle. It intrigued him to see what he was looking at.

 

The attractive visuals moved left to right, and entertaining sounds and small buttons shifted the visuals from one place to another. Christopher was utterly delighted. Talking about the children born in the 21st century, he took no time to figure out how those buttons worked, and the three hours in the restaurant didn't seem to bother anyone. His dad brought food and started shoving it under his mouth. Christopher didn't register what he was eating. Things that he would've never eaten if he saw what it looked like, veggies, onions, etc. All the parties seemed ecstatic, Christopher's parents, restaurant staff, and, yes, HIM. Imagine a lost child running around above and beyond. They all wanted quiet time and activity for Christopher. What they didn't know was that the storm was just brewing ....and it was just the beginning....

 

After this event, it became routine. Christopher happily sat in his stroller with his device and entertained himself for hours while his parents shopped around. The tiny device went everywhere with Christopher, in the car, at a friend's house, or the restaurant. Everyone was happy, and no one complained about anything. It seemed like all the kids around them were doing the same thing. Why bother?

 

Christopher was passionate about the arts from the age of 4. His parents decided to push him and choose whatever he wanted to do with his career as he grew up. Fortunately, Christopher bagged some TV projects and modeling assignments. During the events, the Fashion shows, and auditions, he engaged himself in video games until he was invited on stage. His parents were thrilled to see his attention, that he actually heard his name and went on stage. They didn't bother. Over the years, the devices were upgraded with the latest branded models. 

 

Time flew by, and Christopher turned six. Life took another turn when his family moved to a different country, but the love of games was intact. Going forward, Christopher's parents took his passion for modeling and took him to a few auditions in the new country. They signed up, worked with the agents, and landed their first job immediately. On this one, Christopher got the main lead in a TV commercial. Christopher's parents couldn't be more excited.

 

Next year on Christmas, they bought him a PS4 in the name of Santa Claus with three free mature games. Young parents as they were, they had no idea if they should allow Christopher to play adult games at that age. Every child in the vicinity and his friend circle was into gaming by then. Something stuck with them when they realized Christopher was getting too indulged in gaming. His behavior was changing drastically. Trapped in his gaming world, Christopher wanted nothing but video games. He didn't want to talk to anyone and didn't go out to play. 

 

It bothered his parents, and they created a new rule of no TV or games on weekdays but weekends, to which Christopher agreed. Seven-year-old Christopher auditioned for most major shows but was reluctant to carry his device in the car and pass his time playing while his parents waited for his turn in the auditions. When he was called inside, Christopher turned pink and purple. He was at the game's last level and almost about to win. The repercussions were seen inside the audition room, where he didn't give his best because he was so pissed. 

 

Consecutive incidents like this made his parents extremely upset. They drove miles for these auditions, and their son didn't even want to perform. The agent also sensed his lack of interest, and auditions slowly stopped. 

 

At home, Christopher wanted to live in his gaming world and had no interest in participating in home activities or chores. He was always busy on the weekend playing games or watching TV. His parents made another mistake of not setting strict rules for him to get things done, as he was the first child. Many experiments took place in the household, but the results were insignificant. 

 

 On a dark winter night, Christopher's mom was taken to the hospital in an ambulance. She was 36 weeks pregnant, and her water broke. Christopher was anxiously waiting for his little brother. At midnight, when They moved her to the operation theater for emergency surgery. Christopher happily played a soccer video game while they waited outside. His father brought it to keep him occupied, so he didn't get bored. Soon after the surgery, the new baby came into the new world. Christopher's dad ran outside the theatre with the baby to inform him of the good news. His eyes shone bright, and he asked when he could see his little brother. After a few minutes, he saw the baby, smiled, and returned to the device. No emotions, nothing. It was the baby brother he always wanted, his little brother, with whom he wanted to play soccer. He should have jumped around after seeing his cute little face and asked his mother how she felt. But no empathy at all. The video game won another emotional event. 

 

All day on weekends, Christopher engaged in gaming and slowly distanced himself from family gatherings, outings, or other activities. One day, while his dad was away, his mom had a massive argument with Christopher about playing mature games. She didn't want him to touch them anymore, for which he agreed and never looked at them for the next three years until he was 12. He loved his mother and respected her decision for once. 

 

Now, since his parents understood that he was only interested in games, nothing else. They started controlling it, but it was too late. He had lost the foundation years, the learning stages where he could learn to bond. He wanted to live in the virtual world and talk to his so-called friends on the web. None of that was real. It was a dream world where Christopher loved to live. He loved his parents, but his priorities were clear.

 

Dealing with Christopher and his affair with gaming left his parents in awe. They didn't want that for him. They wanted him to learn the actual life, but Christopher was obsessed. His friends were in the same boat. But there were things to be dealt with differently, which sometimes needed emotions, love, and understanding. That was it. His parents had had enough and decided to raise their second child differently. They felt guilty about introducing new things to Christopher which weren't necessary.

 

Jess was a happy baby. He slowly filled the house with happiness. Mom took the baby to age-appropriate activities where Jess met new children and engaged in crafts and activities. Most of their days were booked with Mom and child classes, lullaby sessions, reading books, and library trips. Jess didn't get to use any devices but watched nursery rhymes on TV. By the age of 2, Jess was keeping himself busy solving puzzles and toys. He created his own little world as an independent and content child, never too much trouble.

 

Seeing his mother shoveling the snow, Jess started helping out when he was 4. He wanted to engage in whatever his parents were doing while Christopher rested on a couch watching movies. Jess's interest grew in drawing and crafts; he sat for hours with paper and crayons. His TV choices were limited to Science Max and all other science-related shows. By the time Jess was 5, he was told to bring a learning device to the school. He hadn't used any devices before. His friends carried I-pads to school, monitored by the class teacher. At home, the no TV weekday rule was still in action, so boys had to do some learning after school.

 

By age 7, Jess learned to make sandwiches and whip pancakes. He helped his father in the garden and even helped with house chores. Jess cried if he didn't get to bake bread or was not allowed to clean the house. What was happening? In the same household, there was a child who wouldn't move an inch until he was told a million times, and this other child cried because he didn't get to choose house chores. 

 

His parents knew exactly what helped him and were thrilled. They had now understood the difference between their two children and their upbringing patterns.

 

They tried it differently this time, which literally worked. Jess turned twelve and still never got addicted to the dangerous virtual gaming world. He played educational games provided by the teacher or approved by his parents. Jess was a compassionate child who got busy reading books and was interested in everything his parents did and wanted him to do. Jess shined in school. His teacher, peers, and neighbors loved his empathetic attitude. He was kind and caring. 

 

It felt like a dream to his parents. They wished if they had done the same thing with Christopher as well, maybe he would have turned out to be different. They blamed GAMING for it and warned the other parents the same.

 

Are you a young parent who wants to provide everything for their children? A parent who wants to buy a child out with expensive presents? Then be ready to face the consequences. Start teaching good values when they are little. Always learn yourselves before handing out just anything to young kids. You never know what harm it could bring in the future.  Instead install good, healthy, rewarding behavior from the very beginning. The video game world is danegrous and video game addition can sometimes lead to mental health problems, anxiety, ADHD and so many other problems.